Refreshing Progress- A Slave’s Journey

June 9, 2012 at 16:39 (M/S) (, , , , , , , )


My main reason for writing the last two posts was for Angelflare to read them.  It is much easier for me to formulate thoughts and process emotions in text form, especially when he hasn’t caught me off guard to talk about them.

I was a little worried he’d be upset for me airing out my slave laundry to the masses, but I realize after doing so and talking to other slaves that these are pretty common thoughts and concerns.  His main issue with my service thus far was that he didn’t feel like I was trying to sort through my blockages.  His perspective made it seem like I was more resisting than struggling.  Once it was clarified that I do want to do this but don’t always know how we were free to have open discussion and move forward.

So, last night he tried something new.  Instead of starting with something he knows I have problems with, he started with something he knows I not only like but haven’t had in some time.  I was able to lose myself to the sensation instead of wrapping myself up in analysis and over-thinking ever word and move, and the rest just happened for me.  It was amazingly free feeling, one I hope I can replicate on my own in time.

While I know he won’t always make things this easy for me, this incident put me at ease and gave me a little fresh air to breathe.  After feeling like I was failing for so long, I needed a little reassurance and confidence building.  It reaffirmed that he wants me to succeed in this, which fortifies my desire to succeed for him.

And so…we continue.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: